Becoming the 4 McCaffery's

We've created this webpage for our family, friends, and future adoptive families to follow us in our adoption journey to Kazakhstan to become a family of 4. Thanks for reading, we hope you enjoy it!!

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Saturday, 15 Apr





Last night we had a bit of crying again from Sam. After about 15 minutes, I went to pick him up and give him a hug and put him back down but as soon as I was about to put him down he was already snoring away. I think he just needs a bit of reassurance that we’re still there. Our sleeping situation is far from ideal. The boys have to sleep on a pull out sofa that isn’t very comfortable and we’re in the next room on a futon that is starting to wreak havoc on both of our backs. Toady started much better than yesterday, Vitalik was more at ease with us and acted more like a son than a visitor. He enjoys both giving and receiving affection and is starting to speak more words. He has no interest in books at this time, but I think that will change down the road as he seems to enjoy doing or trying to do everything Ian does. I feel in love with Sam today. I was having a really hard time with the fact that for the first 2 wks I was not “in love” with Sam. I knew I cared about him, and wanted to protect him and keep him from harms way, but I honestly couldn’t say that I loved him. I think it was due to the fact that I am a very emotional and touchy feely person and even though I read about how institutionalized children don’t like to make eye contact, or give/accept affection, it was still very hard for me and Ian to bear. I now know in my heart that everything will be okay down the road, even if that road will be a bit bumpy at times. I just wanted to speak about having those feelings because it really concerned me that I could be such a sappy person and yet not feel “true love” for my beloved Sam right away. This afternoon we ventured out to the “Trash Park.” The boys had a great time sliding down the slides and climbing over semi-broken playground equipment. I call it Trash Park because not only is there an abundance of litter but because the apartment complex trash bins are located next to the park and are either overflowing or being burnt vs. being taken to a local dump. Still, it was great to get outside and enjoy the sunshine. On the way home we stopped at the supermarket to pick up some mini chocolate milk boxes for the boys and Sam was in complete and total awe. I went back to the supermarket solo to purchase a few more things. For all of the things I don’t enjoy about Kazakhstan, their people make up for it once you break the initial barrier. I have a friend at the supermarket, a Kazakh grocery clerk who likes to practice her English and help me with my Russian. I think I may stay the entire time with Vitalik as I fear leaving him for the 3 or so weeks will cause him to reconstruct the walls we have been bringing down. This will be very hard for me as I have never been away from Ian for more than 2 days. I know he’ll be safe and happy with his 2 Grammy’s and his Daddy, but I will miss our special daily routines. I adore Olga our Orphanage liaison and she has given me her home and cell phone numbers and promises to check up on me and stated I can call her day or night. Having access to a computer will help me feel connected to home as well. I feel better knowing I can get by on my very limited Russian, and most things are either walking distance or a quick bus ride away. Plus, with the nice weather, there’s always “Trash Park and Dilapitated Disney to keep us busy!!

Newsflash….. Sam did NOT finish all of his food. He even offered it to us. Dinner tonight was quite fancy, fish sticks, pears, and bread and butter. We’d like to think he was just being the thoughtful boy that he usually is, but more than likely he didn’t care for fish sticks and figured that was the best way to get rid of them. That’s ‘it from this side of the world. I’ll attach some photos of Trash Park and Sam, in awe of cooking some bacon.

PS. We hope everyone has a Happy Passover and Happy Easter!

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